Gimme a DAMN Break! ~Better said by Nell Carter ;)

Well, I am going to try and get comfortable with this whole blogging thang, so practice makes perfect right? Right.  I have to say my last one was kinda weak, almost as weak as the Jay Z/Kanye song I referred to in my last blog.  Ah, but to the point.  Let's get started. 

I thought about a few things this morning that made me smile. The first being...drum roll please...CLICHES!
GOOD GOD! Stop with the "it is what it is" and "at the end of the day".  Can you not think of a better way to transition to your next thought? Is it really what it is? When it is stated, isn't someone on the other end of that thinking it isn't? What is it really? Yes, maybe it is what it is, so that's why you said it. Do you need to make sure people know that by saying,"it is what it is"? On, on to the next one..."at the end of the day". Why wait that long to validate something? Couldn't it be the same at the beginning of the day? Is this getting confusing yet? Look, I'm not saying don't use cliches. They are applicable in every day life. Just please try and stay away from the ones the idiots on reality TV use, constantly, at the end of every sentence in every episode of whatever housewife, bridezilla, real world (is that show even on anymore) type show you watch. I am not saying anything is wrong with reality TV. SHOOOTT, I love me some Jersey Shore. What? I do. I have a pair of damn Snooki slippers, which are rismiculously comfortable and loudly animal printed. I also have a lil' semi crush  on Walter Mathou's twin, The Situation. So I'll just finish this section saying, well dawg, it is what it is and the end of the day you're the one that makes the decision. ;p Gimme a damn break!

"I'm too old for that"
That is the WORST saying I hear regularly.  You make yourself too old to do stuff. Once again of course there are boundaries, but seriously have some fun with your life! It doesn't mean you have to go out and get wasted all the time. Enjoy life. If you get an invitation from a friend to do something out of the ordinary. Go Nike and just do it! What is there to lose? You get to spend time with a friend you may or may not see enough AND you have experienced something. Now I will step off my high horse and move on.

What the hell~
What the hell does a hash tag do? What is it's purpose? "'Splain me Lucy!" I see them all the time.  I know you use them but ya know I don't get it.  Maybe I'm too old for this social network stuff ;)

Music~
Let me touch on some pop culture...Beyonce...who is also known to me as Beyonstank.
I used to be such a BIG fan of Destiny's Child. I was almost a Beyonce fan until I heard her attempt to hit some Mariah Carey notes. TO ME and me only, I feel like she is a robot.  She is a GREAT entertainer and I do LOVE some of her songs. I feel like she needs to learn how to control her voice somehow. I dunno I'm just a critic not a voice teacher. However, I just think her voice is not on point all the time, and you all know I can sing WAY better, HA! kidding...here is good Beyonce
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_RVId9OkgI

Here is the Beyonce that hurt my ears to listen...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2EwViQxSJJQ&ob=av2e

The song has a great message, but I feel like Beyonce tries to do soo much with her voice when she could just simply sing the note instead of jackin' it around everywhere. Yes, I know I should support my H town folks. I do.  I keep an open mind, Beyonce is probably a really smart bidness woman. However, I cannot purchase an album.  I do have to say the album with Hip Hop Star and Sweet Dreams Ego and Halo...that shit was TIIIGHT!! and HELL YES I purchased a few songs...seee I'm not a total Beyonstank hater!

Work~
I sometimes dread going to work in the mornings.  Especially, during the summertime, when I would much rather be at the beach. Today was one of those days. Yeah I know "tropical storm Don" whatever. I hear there are some gnarly waves during a storm. Ya know since I surf and all...I don't. This morning made it worth coming to work.  Anyway, I make a pit stop in the bathroom this morning and make eye contact with a lady who was also making a pit stop. We are sitting there quietly waiting for the other to start peeing.  Well, I peed, she farted. BAHAHAH! Now here's the question.  What would you do? Laugh to yourself, cuz farts are funny? OR OR OR do you fart back to make her feel comfortable? I was tempted to do that latter.  I am not ashamed.  I can't stand it if someone farts and another person is like "ew gross" gimme a break fool! You never farted in yo life? PUHLEASE! Oh and I'm sure when you fart its not gross. Whatev. Get over it, people fart. Poor lady, waited until I left the bathroom to come out.  I almost wanted to console her, put my hand against the stall door and let her know that I too fart and I see nothing wrong with it. Its as natural as the hair on her head....or was it?  Farts are funny and that's it.

Ah the troll badger.  He has been boasting about some diet he's been on for 3 weeks. Eh, he still is a hunch backed, no neck disgusting, inappropriate RUDE, troll. "Please Edie tell us how you really feel." His client came and he started talking about weight loss with him. His client came in was obviously overweight. His client did not ask for his dieting advice. I'm pretty sure he was visiting for legal advice. Now, that my children, is fuckin' rude. People battle with their weight their entire lives. Does some short chunky troll give you hope because he claims he's "pretty buff for a 40 yr old". No, troll badger! No one wants to touch you let alone feel your muscles. OH and NO ONE needs your health advice. So once again, I day dream of tripping him or maybe spitting in his food. Ah, a girl can dream right? He needs to stay in his cave and blare his Katy Perry, Taylor Swift, and Pink (i love her but not when troll badger is listening) and pick his nose like most troll badgers do. I'm just glad he got over the Usher "Yeah" period.  Yes, this was recently, not 2006.

You can tell I dream big huh? Visions of being on peopleofwalmart.com and spitting in food. I am one damn mature individual.  On that note, I am going to go make fart noises as people pass by, bend over and sit down. Have a great day peeps!