GOOOOOD MORNING IIINNNNTERRRNNETTTTT! Heh, get it Good morning, Vietnam?
I am going to try my best to keep my thoughts organized this is a HUGE deal for me.
This blog was sparked by an early morning conversation with a very good friend of mine. She went on a date with someone who asked her if she ever dated "bi-racially". First, he's an idiot for not using the proper word for describing an "interracial" relationship. There were soo many things wrong with what she told me he said. First, you should know her and I are both mixed. I am not going to tell our races because they don't matter. The other reason is, and I am speaking generally, when you tell someone your race they automatically put you into a group or only identify you with ONE of the races you are mixed, and all of the stereotypes and generalizations that come with it. Most of the time if you are a minority mixed with Caucasian, people do not or will not allow you to identify yourself as white. Other times people won't allow you to identify yourself with the other race. When say I allow, yes you are allowed to do what ever you want, but the person will argue with you. Why can't you identify yourself with both? You ARE both races, why can't you identify with both? Why do people have such a hard time grasping the fact people ARE American. America is a melting pot of sooo many different types of people.
"You know you're racist when..."
What is this..."Oh that's why you...*fill in trait here* because you're *fill in race here*". People as much as you say you are not racist, you probably are. If you find yourself telling a story then feeling it's necessary to share person's race, as if it makes a difference in the person's character in your story, you're racist. If you find yourself saying, "I'm not racist I have *fill in race or sexual orientation here* friends", you're racist/prejudice. If you identify a certain race with stereotypes and other generalizations or you start a sentence with, "I"m not racist, but...". Guess what? You're racist. If you see a person's color first, ya know, you're kinda racist. Well, at least in my book. I see it like this. People are like The Breakfast Club. Granted, yes all the people in that movie are white, BUT the idea is still there. The letter they write to the principal at the end spells out exactly how I feel about EVERYONE! It goes like this...
"Dear Mr. Vernon, we accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong. What we did WAS wrong, but we think you're crazy to make us write an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us... In the simplest terms and the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is ... a brain ...and an athlete...and a basket case...a princess...and a criminal...Does that answer your question?
Sincerely yours, the Breakfast Club.".
Yes this was a bunch of teenagers shoved together in a John Hughes movie, but the last 3 sentences are truth. You see people how you want to see people! In every race there is a brain, an athlete, a basket case, a princess/prince, and a criminal. BOOM! There is no race that doesn't have any of those characteristics. Who gives a shit about statistics? Yes, your parents, your surroundings helped mold your view points, but you grow up and move out. You mold yourself and your children. It is up to you to see past physical characteristics to see the person and character inside and to teach your children that. It doesn't matter where you grew up, or where you've been. How are you treating and speaking about people today?
"What are you?" ~
Another one of my friends touched on this subject, she did made a very good point. Why do people need to know someone's ethnic background(s) so bad? First, I think it is SOOOO rude when someone has just barely met you and they ask "what are you" "what's your background" etc. Why does it matter so much? If I tell you and you don't like it, am I not worth your time anymore? In my opinion, solely MY opinion, I believe it does not matter. REALLY and TRULY. I NEVER ask people what their ethnic background is, sure I'm curious, but please explain to me what race, ethnicity, or sexual orientation has to do with anything? No one ever has an answer for me except they're curious. Save the curiosity, 9 times out of 10 people will tell you eventually.
My mother used to tell me people treated me different when I was little because I am brown. I don't know if that was her paranoia or if it was truth. I did grow up in a suburb. As, I grew up I never realized my "color" because it was something that really didn't matter to me. Then I went to college, in Austin, a place that I found is not as racially harmonious as people there would like to think it is. I can't tell you HOW many times people asked what my ethnicity was there. Here in Houston, it's far and few between, maybe it's because Houston is a big melting pot of nationalities. Anyway, while I was in college depending on what race people decided I was depended on how much shit they would talk about another race. Oh, but they weren't racist. Gimme a break. It was strange to go into a world where the first question was "what are you" or "you're not Mexican are you" (as if it was a bad thing). I'll never forget the time a few guys thought my friend was a certain race (she wasn't even remotely close) and they were like, "yeah you can hang out with us 'cause your friend is *fill in race*". People, get past this. Listen to yourself the next time you start to say, "oh yeah those *fill in ethnicity* do that all the time." Modify your reality.
You can apply sexual orientation to the above and you must. Life is not about tolerance, it is about acceptance. I grew up around people and their racist opinions, even those who I love or are close to, don't realize how racist/prejudice they really are. I managed to mold my own appreciation for people. People should pay it forward, as in teach your children there is no color in love or relationships. I will leave this blog with a song, of course, and a little story.
I heard someone telling a story about 2 children. Both mixed. They were playing NBA Jams. The first child picked a one of the black players for his team. The other child asked,"Why did you pick that guy?" The first child explains his skills. The other child says,"No why did you pick him, he's black." This is a PRIME example of an adult influence over a small child. People teach not only your children, but your friends, family, co-workers acceptance by being the best person and role model you can be.
I leave you with this song by En Vogue. Totally thought about this song while I was running and contemplating this race thing...
Free your mind!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uaoSSVQz37A
by the way, En Vogue was tight...enjoy your OPEN MINDED weekend ;)
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